Happy (Just being careful not to offend anyone)

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress , non addictive, gender neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday practiced with the most enjoyable traditions of religious persuasion or secular practices of your choice with respect for the religious / secular persuasions and / or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all .

I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2020, but not without due respect for the calendar of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make our country great ( not to imply that Great Britain is necessarily greater than any other country ) and without regard to the race, creed, colour, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee .

By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms :

This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her / him or others and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. The wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher .

Best Regards ( without prejudice )

Name withheld ( Privacy Act ).


  • In a similar vein, I sometimes reply to emails with a disclaimer.  Particularly when I've received a one line message that has a 100 line disclaimer.

    ************* Start of Disclaimer *************

    1. It is logical to put the disclaimer BEFORE the message to help the
    recipient decide whether or not to read the message.  Disclaimers are not

    2. The information in this email is not confidential.

    2. This email has been sent to whom it has been sent.  If it has not been
    sent to you then you are not reading it.

    3. If you think you have been sent this email by mistake, you are wrong.

    4. If you are easily upset, have a delicate ego or a fractious disposition
    then do not read this email.  DO NOT CLICK ON THE LINKS. 

    5. This email may not have come from me and clicking on the links may have
    dire consequences.  It is the recipient's responsibility to verify that
    this email is genuine.  Please send me an email asking me to verify that
    this email is genuine and I will send you verification by email.

    6. If you do not wish to read this email then do not read it.  You should
    destroy it by printing it out and shredding it.

    7.  Is there any point at all in assuring you that this email has been
    scanned for viruses?  OK then, it has.  I just made that up.

    8. Any disclaimer below this disclaimer is disclaimed.

    9. The message follows.  Oops.  The message precedes.

    ************** End of Disclaimer **************

  • winter solstice holiday

    Bob, you've just offended everyone in  the southern hemisphere.

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